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September 5th

Today has been a long time coming!  I was finally able to take a pregnancy test this morning and I had my first blood test at the clinic today.  I did take a home pregnancy test a few days ago but knew it was probably too soon for anything to show up, even if I was pregnant.  But you can't blame a girl for trying.

Well I wanted to take home test this morning because if it was bad news I wanted time to process everything before the nurse at the clinic called with the bad news.

I took it as soon as I woke up and......pregnant!  WHAT?!  It's a little surreal.  At first, it definitely looked negative and I just put it down and went about getting ready.  I mean, I'm used to seeing negative tests and nothing ever changes with time.  Well now I know why they tell you to wait a few minutes before looking at the test because when I looked 2 minutes later, a faint little line had appeared!  I did not know what to think.  I wasn't sure if I wanted to wake Nate up to tell him or not.  I decided not to because I wanted to wait for the bloodwork to confirm anything AND I wanted to be able to surprise him somehow.  It's so hard with all this stuff because there really are no surprises...he knew as well as I did that I was testing that day. But I was going to try a surprise anyway!

I had to run to the office first before going to get bloodwork done but that was around 8:00 and then back to work to await the results.  The call came a little before 1:00.  It was my nurse, Julie, and she said "congratulations!" and then it all started to get real.

I'm really pregnant.  All of this worked.  I'm going to be a mom.  These stupid, painful shots weren't for nothing.  I took five minutes to just go sit in the bathroom at work and have a little happy/ overwhelmed cry.

I didn't get to surprise Nate how I wanted but that's okay.  Maybe someday I'll be able to.  I feel happy but also not too happy, because I won't let myself get there yet.  There's still a long way to go.  This was just the first test of many but still so exciting to finally have a positive pregnancy test.  Here's to the future!

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